Small word. Huge meaning.
Trust: assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something. One in which confidence is placed.
Right now - at this very moment - the Lord is teaching me about trust....real trust...not just a Sunday School level lesson about trust but 'Red Sea' trust, 'water in the desert' trust, 'the battle is the Lord's' kind of trust.
Our life change from pastoring to becoming an NCC protege has been all about trust from the beginning. Leaving family, a church family, and friends who are family was very difficult to do. Leaving the security of a paycheck was hard to do - but all of it was necessary. My time in Huntsville was up. My time in Washington DC had arrived. We jumped.
Well, to summarize - We moved to Capitol Hill and we we're content until the Lord directed us to move...again...to Alexandria, Virginia. In order to do this we need to sub lease the house on Capitol Hill. We've shown the house several times - people send emails - they call and set up appointments to tour the place - 90% of them fail to show up.
Glenda spends all day Saturday showing the house - people act interested, excited, pumped and then we hear that.......they.......passed on the chance.
The last one was the hardest because the lady contacts the lease agency and says that she wants the place but they can't process her application because their server is down so they have to wait until Monday. Great! we're home-free.....really? No. She changes her mind over the weekend.
Changes her mind? She can't do that. She did.
So here we are - paying for two places - unable to do so - things are looking scary - I'm upset - Glenda is very upset. We're weary. We try to begin second guessing ourselves only to be slapped with the reality that we know that we know that we're supposed to be here.
In the middle of all this God keeps dropping comforting words to me - just like a father encourages his discouraged child. For instance: Glenda has this daily rolodex devotional that she keeps near the kitchen sink. One particular day it gave this advice:
"Patience is not learning how to wait. Patience is learning how to wait and have a good attitude during the process." Hmmmmmm.
One of my scripture verses immediately following that tid bit of timely advice was this:
"Wait for the Lord; be courageous and let your heart be strong. Wait for the Lord." (Psalm 27:14)
Then this morning, January 13, 2009, on the Metro some where in between Franconia-Springfiled and Metro Center my daily scripture reading directed me to Genesis 22. God tells Abraham to sacrifice his son - his only son.
His pride and joy.
The son he loved and cherished.
So they travel for three days - plenty of time to turn back - but they kept on walking. Plenty of time to figure out a new plan and present it to God - argue with Him - but that didn't happen - father and son just kept on walking.
Finally they arrived at the mountain - started to climb the mountain - and Isaac breaks the silence and says, "The fire and the wood are here, but where is the lamb for the burnt offering?"
Abraham's heart must have been crushed when he heard that sweet voice say 'Father' and then follow it with that innocent question.
...where's the lamb?
"Abraham answered, "God Himself will provide the lamb for the burnt offering, my son." Then the two of them walked on together." (emphasis mine.)
It's not by chance that these verses have been in my reading plan the past couple of days. I don't believe in chance. I believe that God wants to speak to us. He's got my attention.
So, I sit here at my desk - typing - no answer in sight but I'm going to make a prediction - He's going to show. I don't know how. I wish I did. I don't know when He's going to work it out but there's one thing that I do know,
So, during this frustrated, uncomfortable, and downright scary time in my life - I'll keep my ears tuned, my eyes open, and my feet moving forward up the mountain.
Where's the offering? God will provide. He's my only hope.
He showed up. All is well.
He showed up. All is well.